Bedouins v Wilkes Tranter at Enville – Wednesday, 20 June 2012

Bedouins win by 80 runs

Report by Spratters, who apparently has the Caps Lock jammed on his keyboard. I’d try and make it more legible but I’m pushed for time. Have I told you I’m going away?

WITH ONLY NINE BEDS AVAILABLE, TWO YOUNG WHIPPERSNAPPERS, TOM DAVIES AND TOM NEWELL, REGULAR ENVILLE 3RD TEAMERS, WERE DRAFTED IN. (IS EVERYONE UNDER 16 CALLED TOM THESE DAYS?)I WAS CONCERNED THAT THIS WAS TO BE A CHALLENGING GAME. AS WE WERE GOING THROUGH OUR STRETCH ROUTINES AND PRE MATCH PHYSICAL JERKS I COUNTED 23 MEMBERS OF THE OPPOSITION, ALSO WARMING UP. THANKFULLY 12 OF THEM WERE INTERLOPERS WHO HAD COME TO USE THE ENVILLE NET FACILITY. BUT AS IT TURNED OUT, THE OPPOSITION COULD HAVE DONE WITH AN EXTRA 12…..

I DON’T KNOW WHO WON THE TOSS BUT I ASSUME IT WASN’T US BECAUSE WE BATTED FIRST. THE WILKES TRANTER OPENING BOWLERS CAUSED LITTLE PROBLEMS FOR OUR OPENERS – BRANCH AND LIPPET. THE CONSISTENT SHORT DELIVERIES AND LOOPING FULL TOSSES FEEDING MR. BRANCH’S CUT SHOT AND LIPPO’S TRADEMARK LEGSIDE SLOG. BOTH OPENERS REACHED THEIR RETIREMENT (31 EACH) AND WERE REPLACED BY WOODHOUSE AND TOM NEWELL. (PITY LIPPO HAD TO STOP, HE LOOKED GOOD FOR AT LEAST 35).

A FINE INNINGS FROM WOODHOUSE SAW HIM RETIRE ON 32. NEWELL WAS STUMPED ON 6 STORMING DOWN THE PITCH ATTEMPTING TO LAUNCH THE BALL OVER THE PAVILION. HILL JR. WAS BOWLED FOR A DUCK, AND HANCOCK CONTINUED HIS RECENT GOOD FORM WITH A USEFUL 12. THIS BROUGHT BYWATER AND SPRATTERS TO THE WICKET FOR THE LAST FEW OVERS, THE LATTER MAKING A TENTATIVE 4 AND BYWATER LOOKING GOOD FOR 7 UNTIL THE LAST BALL, UNFORTUNATELY RUN OUT DUE TO SPRATTERS CALLING FOR A RUN TO DESPERATELY TRY AND INCREASE HIS TOTAL TO 5.

SO WE WERE SITTING PRETTY ON 135 AFTER 20 OVERS. A GOOD TOTAL. ALL THE TEAM WERE IN GOOD SPIRITS EXCEPT LEE BYWATER WHO WAS IN A BAD MOOD BUT DIDN’T WANT TO DISCUSS IT.

THE INNINGS OF WILKES TRANTER STARTED WITH SPRATTERS AND DAVIES OPENING THE BOWLING, KEEPING IT REASONABLY TIGHT FOR THE FIRST 3 OVERS (IF YOU DON’T COUNT SPRATTERS BEING SMACKED FOR 6). THEN IN THE 3RD OVER DAVIS FINDS THE PERFECT LINE AND LENGTH AND PICKS UP TWO WICKETS, BOTH BOWLED.

GEORGE REPLACED SPRATTERS AT THE KINVER END, KEEPING IT TIGHT, AND THEN IN HIS THIRD OVER, DAVIS BOWLS ANOTHER ONE, THE DANGEROUS LEFT HANDED TOP SCORER. AND IF THAT WASN’T ENOUGH, IN HIS FOURTH OVER CLEAN BOWLS ANOTHER TWO TO FINISH WITH FIGURES OF  4-1-9-5. A SUPERB PERFORMANCE.

NEXT TO BOWL WERE BYWATER AND PEARSON, THE REMAINING BATSMEN IN THEIR INTERESTING VARIETY OF SHORTS, OFFICE SHIRTS AND ODD SOCKS FACING AN IMPOSSIBLE TASK.

PEARSON PICKED UP ONE WICKET FOR NINE OFF FOUR OVERS, (A SUPERB GROUND LEVEL SLIP CATCH BY SKIPPER JOHN BRANCH) AND BYWATER TWO FOR SEVEN, BOTH BOWLED. THE OTHER YOUNG TOM BOWLED TWO OVERS FROM THE PAVILION END, PICKING UP TWO WICKETS AND FINISHING THE GAME, JUST AS SPRATTERS WAS LIMBERING UP FOR ONE MORE OVER TO TRY AND JOIN THE WICKET PARTY (HURMPH!)

WILKES TRANTER ALL OUT FOR 55 AND A CONCLUSIVE WIN FOR THE BEDS. AFTER THE GAME A DELICIOUS TEA WAS SERVED, THOUGH THE HERO OF THE GAME TOM DAVIS DISSAPPEARED AFTER A QUICK PRESS CONFERENCE TO AVOID THE PAPARAZZI. PLEASE CONTACT THE CHAIRMAN FOR INFORMATION ON THE NEWLY FORMED TOM DAVIS FAN CLUB. BENEFITS INCLUDE BADGE, T-SHIRT AND MONTHLY FANZINE.

(We didn’t even get him to sign the contract – Ed)